You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
