whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize