chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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