I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
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I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
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"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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