i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I deserve this hangover.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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