Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
