If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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