I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
