i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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