There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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