Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
