Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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