After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
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