Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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