She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize