Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
