Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
