Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Randomize
