hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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