You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420