I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
you inspire me to be a worse person
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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