dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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