Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize
