dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize
