I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
you traded sex for a burrito?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize