You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
