I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
