covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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