I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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