Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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