so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
