never play flip cup with pint glasses
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
