508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize