well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just found puke in my bra..
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
