There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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