Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
