what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
