Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
