is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
