dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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