it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
