She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize