that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
