I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
