I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
