I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
