Grow some girl-balls and come out already
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
