I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i just made my gag reflex go away.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Sorry about my life...
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize