I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
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