I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize